Today I post out of dear necessity. I post because I feel I´m drowning.
I love so many things in this life, I love beauty, I love creating, I love inspiration, I love sweet things, I love LOVE, I love my family, I love freedom, and I choose to see life through the lense of all these things.
For a while now it has been a challenge, something I have held on to, motivated by my instict to survive without giving in to fear and bitterness. My family left Peru and found a home in Mexico many, many years ago. I always considered we somehow fled violence, terrorism, car-bombs and the fact that this was common. We moved to the States, then Mexico City and then left once again, looking for even more peace and quiet, to the town we´ve been living in for the past 19 years. Now, as a mother, a wife, a daughter and a sister, I look around and feel that we have travelled so far from our family, our roots, our beginning, for nothing. Today I can´t help it. Today I am angry because I DO live in fear. And even though hate is a horrible word, I hate. I hate seeing blood on the sidewalk outside my house, MY CHILDREN´ S HOME. I hate that you can find bodies hanging off bridges, piled into cars on the side of the road, any road. I hate the word narco-execution, the horror it implies, the fact that we use it on a daily basis and that now it is reaching people that have NOTHING to do with drugs. People we know. Innocent people with families that will never be able to forget or cease to feel indescribable pain for as long as they live. I hate the fact that my husband and I even consider building a hide out, or teaching our children how to duck and hide. Wasn´t this something my parents travelled so far to keep me away from? Am I now supposed to drop everything, our home, friends, years of building a business, and the love we have for this beautiful, blood stained country, and RUN?
I blog, almost everyday, for myself. I blog looking for beauty, and to remind myself that it still exists. I will continue to do so, I need to continue to believe, to look for light and keep my G and G´s childhood and innocence intact.
As much as I possibly can.
They are my reason, my everything and my inspiration.